its the most wonderful time of the year

I'm sitting on the couch at home, half decorating for christmas and half watching the maryland boston college game...so far today i woke up, ate like three bowls of cereal, did a paper, watched the great gatsby with my gma, went for a run and showered...i feel like its christmas and im getting really upset that I have to go back to school tomorrow morning and start worrying about things again..i feel like the holiday season is underway but college students cannot really focus on the holiday until finals are over which is robbig us of the christmas joy. instead of happiness my days will be filled with orgo and physics for the next two and a half weeks..what a shame..ill be home again on the 16th and I cannot wait esp cuz jamie will be home for part of break yay! This break has been great though..ill give a little sumary..

tuesday night-drive around the county in emilys new element
wednesday-mall with kristen, green door!!
thursday-parade, thanksgiving food, mom and dads wedding video, md bball game (we beat michigan state), twilight which was amazing
friday-haircut, panera, errands, christmas tree lighting, salsa's, bonfire

and i already told you what i did today..ok well i dont really have much else to say..perhaps i will try to study soon..:(


And you flashback to when he said forever and always...

practice makes perfect...

Today is sunday, which means i have two huge papers to write so this is a low but seeing since it is before noon, i suppose i have enough time to blog for a little...
yesterday=definite high. woke up, made mashed potatoes and stuffing, ate thanksgiving dinner at the gingerbread house with all the homies, this was followed by heavy drinking, a few of us braving it out at the football game then coming home and passing out. we lost by like 30 points to fl state which is kind of pathetic seeing as how we just won to UNC who was ranked way above us. i dont know..its weird when our football or basketball team sucks i do get embarrassed that i go here. like i understand im not actually playing but i just feel like we should be amazing and when we get killed or are the most inconsistent team in the world it is embarrassing. if we would have lost to vermont in bball on friday i would have been super embarrassed cuz we have such a good reputation for sports and its like my team losing to some team where their school doesnt even care about them and they get nowhere near as much finding as we get..haha i dont know i just want us to be better.

so im going home for thanksigiving break on tuesday night. only a few things stand in my way. i already have lots of plans for break but we will see how everything goes. Green door on wednesday night, making xmas sweaters with dei, going over colbys, hanging out, seeing twlight, studying :( but im happy just to get away..meme flew in yesterday also and i think she is using a walker so this break might be different for our fam.

to what jamie blogged about yesterday, there are sooo many moments in my life i wish i could relive or just go back to to expiereience the amount of happiness i felt at that particular moment. sometimes you imagine yourself being so happy at some moment in the past and think that you will never reach that again, but this is a huge illusion you mind tries to trick you with. i just try to remember that every second i spend dwelling on the past is a second i am taking away from the present, and i am really just robbing myself of happiness i could be in right now. it may seem like what you used to have was better than what you have now but its all mental..its the easiest thing in the world to give up and think that life sucks and nothing is fair and you have lost things you will never get back; it is hard to let go and love where you are at in every single moment and whoever your with. its the people in your life that make it and i know what it feels like to lose them let me tell you. Im not saying to ignore it when that happens...just let whatever feeling you have roll through you and then be done with it. If it is out of your control, just dont let it ruin your life. everyone can rebuild no matter what the size of the tornado is...and i think t swift agrees with living for the present..

Don't know how long it's gonna take to feel okay
But I know I had the best day
With you today

7 things i have realized today (and its only 3PM):

1. My micro TA has a gf and despite what I think, he does NOT want to have an affair with me (thanks ned for pointing that out)
2.I hate scooters and swim team coaches with a passion
3. You feel super cool when you spend 10 minutes learning ROY G BIV in your physics 2 class and than your crazy but adorable professor in his clogs and vest tells you to come closer because despite what you think he does shower everyday and that the church used to think rainbows were a sign that god was happy the storm was over
4. Eric Cullen is the most perfect character to ever be created
5. My ipod is alive (see post from this morning)
6. Only is the weirdest English word ever created..just think about it for a while
7. Colby emily kristen and I have the sweetest dance moves ever and we are going to showcase them on thanksgiving day by dancing to the on the line song that girl will never be mine by N sync.

best wishes....

ok you know those songs that just remind you of someone you are trying desperately to not think about or forget? i hate it when that happens but it seems like sometimes, one person has the ability to take over your entire ipod and every single song that comes on can be tied to them in some way or another..then your like well crap, i should just give up on listening to music in general because they have ruined half of your favorite songs and the other half just makes you get all sappy and weird about the past when you don't even have time to be thinking about the past anyway in your day that is jammed packed with a hundred and two things to do..so thats where I'm at today. it is Wednesday, hump day, the day that seems to last forever, the day that i have to go to my stupid two hour shift at work from 5-7 that most of the time pushes me over the edge. you know, usually is sooo easy for me to be happy and focus on the current day and current situation (which i think is actually the key to being happy...not dwelling on the past or fearing the future but just living) but today i feel like is an off day. so yea im gonna keep on keeping on and probably snap out of it since now that i got that out. Maybe my ipod will even change its attitude and give me some happy pump up songs. A new ipod for Christmas would most likely solve this problem..just throwing that out there..but ok enjoy your frigid day ps it snowed yesterday!! :)



i miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain...
so in love that im acting insane.

All there's left to do is run......

sooo, now its my turn to blog about my taylor swift obsession. i cant stop listening to this dang album. my favorites at the current moment would be def the way i loved you, breathe, and hey stephen..even though my sister hates on choice 3...but I made dei listen to the album today while we were hanging out "studying" and by studying i mean rocking out, facebook stalking, eating cookies, gossiping, and watching sydney white...but yea i got her addicted to i think. I dont get how t. swift (as i so affectionately call her) writes all these lovely songs about love..like how many relationships could this girl have possibly had in her 16 years of life? I guess she is a really good guesser because I would without a doubt live my life by her songs which is weird since she is so much younger than me. Ok keeping with the media track, i found out twlight comes out next weekend, not the 12th which i had marked in my calender so now im super pumped for that...also TRl finale was on tonight..not that i watch it anymore or anything but it was strange to think back on how addicted i was..actually everyone was with that show..especially in the otown days :) which by the way, fyi i found out tonight that vlad is an APA (ashley parker angel) fan...WHOKNEW!? he is def the only boy i know who would ever admt to liking ashley..so now i love him even more than before if thats possible haha

in other areas of my life,this weekend was pretty eventful. we had club bball championships here at UMD in the armory and over 20 teams were here. Besides being very stressful, it was extrmely tiring. We played five games, lost to UVA and peen state for the concellation ship(yes i am aware that is not how you spell that)...so not too good but what are you going to do? ugh besides that ltown girls high school soccer state championship was last night and it was pretty fun cuz i got to see colb and wasted josh and heather in her duct tape dress that she even wore out to the bar that night...props to you heath.. and evan who i havent seen in ages and just had acl surgery...so i was glad i went but yeaaaa... oh and tonight was ASB kickoff which was cool cuz me and puja (my cotrip leader) got to meet all our pariticpants who i should be friending on facebook as we speak but oh well ill just do it tomorrow..

Ok well its mad late so i am pooped..so ill end the blog like i began it..with a little t. swift love for you all..

Breakin' down and coming undone
It's a roller coaster kinda rush
And I never knew I could feel that much
And that's the way I loved you

Anytime I need to see your face, I just close my eyes..

Take what you're given before its gone...
start holding on, keep holding on..
Don’t grieve like the rest of men, who have no hope.
there are some things you have to let go... but that doesn’t mean they should leave you.
Yesterday is history,
tomorrow is a mystery.
today is a gift...that’s why it’s called the present.
Never forget yesterday, but always live for today
Because you never know what tomorrow will bring...
Or what it can take away.
God Hath not promised
Skies always blue
Flower strewn pathways
All our lives through
God hath not promised
Sun without rain
Joy without sorrow
Peace without pain
But god hath promised
Strength for the day
Rest for the labor
Light for the way.
Grace for the trials
Help from above
Unfailing sympathy
Undying love.
I'm thinking back on the past, it's true that time is flying by too fast.
I miss you, I miss your smile, and I still shed a tear every once in a while.
And even though it's different now, you're still here somehow....
My heart wont let you go and I need you to know I miss you
watch this fade away...everything fades away...keep your head up...the colors are beautiful

i really cant believe its been five years..
each day is not a promise, its a gift that has been given to you.
RIP Dad 11/10/03

im falling into memories of you...

its sunday morning, 1030AM, ive been up since 730AM because we had a flag football game which unfortunately we lost be one stupid touchdown...6 to zip. but anyway im gonna go back to sleep but i got caught up reading post secret since it is so addicting... read it...http://postsecret.blogspot.com/...and think about these people's lives..i know we all have our secrets and hard times anf stuff but some of these are so deep..and im sitting here listening to depressing sad music which is just making me be in such a reflective mood...every single person you see has a secret like the ones that are posted on post secret..no matter if they submit it or not. thats alot of hurt people and sometimes very strange people walking around interacting with you every day but somehow every single one of them acts so normal and functions. I dont really have a point; its just fascinating to see the things people really think and care about and its not like each sunday i dont think about it, its just that this week is a tiny bit emotional for me so maybe thats why....but yea other updates on my life include that i got a 126 out of 150 on my orgo test (which i still think might be a mistake, i have checked it twn times since i found out last night to make sure its not a mirage haha)..which is n 84 and the average was a 57..i dont know whether to believe it cuz i seriously doubt i did that well but i feel like its rare to make a mistake online but i will find out for sure on wednesday when i get it back. but honestly i started crying last night when i saw my score cuz i was so happy :) so i really hope its real lol other than that, i saw colb last night! and em and kris spent the night here and we went to the army house so yeaa that was really fun...oh and our first bball game was yesterday for the boys and they did amazing..KIM our new asain player is awesome he had like 20 pts and i think everyone is excited about first korean in the NCAA and maybe even in the NBA! i dont know how we got him but we did and right now, if he can offer some consistency, he will easily take over booms spot of fan favorite..who by the way is ballin it up in romania right now and doing pretty dang good i think lol ooook well im getting tired now..ill prob write tomorrow or something...keep it real and read those postsecrets y'all.



i can tell that you don't know me anymore
its easy to forget, sometimes we just forget
and being on this road is anything but sure
maybe we'll forget, i hope we don't forget...

Ransom notes keep falling out your mouth...

imogen heap is amazing. and this day has been filled with hilarious moments..especially at dinner tonight at cheesecake factory..since i will be studying nonstop from now until next tuesday i figured i would give you all another blog..esp cuz lauren is now a dedicated follower of my writing..shoutout to lauren! but ok cheesecake with lauren liz andrew tinsley and tinsleys boyf logan for tinsleys birthday was hilarious..i dont think i have laughed that much in a while...from c note to uncle remus, the gang of waiters at the cheesecake factory are awesome. i wonder if ill get a call from remus :) lol but and i also thouroughly enjoyed laurens stories about the crazy people who come to the bank and offer an expired boating license, have morbidly obsese girlfriend, and make out checks to "my-self" and how she worked at saladworks for one day and falling in a puddle of ranch and crying and calling her mom to come get her lol lauren when you start your blog be sure to recount those stories. so yea that one highlight of my day. The other two were finding out mark and julie from the pool were engaged (so cute!!!) and finding out me and puja have the craziest weirdest couple on the entire planet trying to come on our spring break trip together..like seriously they are strange. and im not having these strange people having sex all over my ASB trip. why would they even pick gaston? do they think we arent mystery solvers and wouldnt put it all together? haha did they think they actually had a chance of doing this? lololol oh my..im tired. night ballers


....Mid-sweet talk, newspaper word cut-outs.
speak no feeling, no i dont believe you
you dont care a bit, no you dont care a bit.

open up your plans and damn your free...

So I just got back from EAT your way through college park, SDT's philanthropy. Being the good little sorority girl that I am, I went to support them slash eat tons of food. I am so happy I went because the generics performed and yes they perform at like every one of our waffle late nights so you think i would have maybe looked at them or listened to them by now but no haha so i actually was trying to leave so i wasnt stuck in the house for the whole thing but i got sucked in by their beautiful voices. I think Im in love with 75% of them...esp the aint no sunshine when shes gone boy..wow im so glad no one has the link to my blog right now haha but yea my goal is to find out his name..they also sang im yours by jason mraz...me and deis song...it was amazing...hence where the title of the blog comes in...i never have expressed how much i enjoy that song...this whole musicaly turn of events of the night has inspired me to write down another TOP TEN LIST!!

Top Ten Songs that Make Me :)
10. Live your life -Rihanna and T.I. -just hasnt been around long enough yet o be any higher than this
9. Build Me Up Buttercup!
8. I'm Ready - Jacks Mann
7. Who Knows - Avril Lavigne
6. Seasons of Love - Rent
5. Just A Ride - JEM
4. Soundtrack to your Life - Ashley Parker Angel
3. There's gotta be More to Life - Stacy Orrico
2. I'm yours- Jason Mraz
1. Happy - Natasha Bedingfield (LISTEN TO IT!)


woo...time to do homework unfortunately :(



Got my dreams, got my life, got my love
Got my friends got the sunshine above...