out of these ashes,

feeling extremely emotional because we were involved in a bus accident on the way home from our game in virginia on tuesday night. i am feeling high and low and so many things are going through my head that i cannot make sense of everything and i cannot sleep. I still believe that everything happens for a reason and i think there may be a few reasons for this although i haven't figured them out. its a miracle that none of the 37 people involved were seriously injured. its a miracle more trees did not come through the bus. its a miracle that we did not flip. i cannot sleep imagining the sheer and utter tragedy and deaths we could have faced if one tiny thing was different. it is haunting me.

It was the day the world went wrong
I screamed till my voice was gone
And watched through the tears
As everything came crashing down
Slowly panic turns to pain
As we awake to what remains
And sift through the ashes that are left behind
But buried deep beneath
All our broken dreams
We have this hope
Out of these ashes beauty will rise
We will dance among the ruins
We will see it with our own eyes
Out of these ashes beauty will rise
For we know joy is coming in the morning
In the morning beauty will rise
So take another breath for now
Let the tears come washing down
If you can't believe, I will believe for you
Cuz I have seen the signs of spring
I can hear it in the distance
And its not too far away
Its the music and the laughter
of a wedding and a feast
I can almost feel the hand of God
Reaching for my face
To wipe the tears away
Say its time to make everything new
Make it all new
This is our hope
This is a promise
It will take our breath away
To see the beauty that's been made
Out of the ashes, out of the ashes

adaptability is being able to adjust to any given situation at any given time

This has been a major theme in my life lately, because I feel like I am constantly changing int he course of a day from Science teacher to technology teacher to green school coordinator to friend to counselor to soccer coach to bball coach to track coach to young life leader to peer to daughter to sister and so on. Everyone has multiple roles they play, but I am working every single day on becoming adaptable to whatever I am doing, just focusing on the task at hand, and being the best I can be at that given moment. This had led me to where I am at right now....extremely satisfied, amazed, and excited at the person I am being guided into becoming and the situations I am so lucky and fortunate enough to be in....I am so exhausted but cannot sleep because of all these thoughts running through my mind. This week has been insanely crazy, and tomorrow is Friday and therefore I cannot wait to relax a little bit. Bball season started on Tuesday and we made first cuts tonight, that was really hard. We had the soccer banquet tonight also which was so awesome. I won a gift set from the Fellowship for Christian Athletes from a raffle drawing that Mr. Heibel pulled. It really was perfect, he introduced me as a former students and player of his, and I got an amazing set of books and gifts, including a new testament sports version Bible, which is so badass and I am so excited to carry it everwhere. Ash got me a nice card and the girls all wrote really touching things to me in my card. It was alot of work, but some moments, everything seems worth it. This may sound cheesy, but the banquet tonight was a sign to me that I am where I am supposed to be. I already feel so comfortable with the bball girls and because I LOVE bball, i really think I will be able to help the bball girls a million times more than soccer. So I can only imagine how awesome this season is going to be. I have also taken it as a sign that we are going to Colorado for YL camp this summer because that is somewhere everyone knows I have wanted to go and considered moving. God is telling me that I am doing what I he wants me to be doing right now, with being a teacher, coach, and YL leader. Every time i take a second and think about my life, I am so grateful that I can keep up with everything. I cannot wait to see the relationships I am able to develop the rest of this year with the kids and pray that God will help me find the correct words. On the friends/relationship front, I am doing SOO much better than I was two months ago. I have amazing support (both old and new) and a very promising future ahead. I just wanted to get out in my blog how excited I am right now and how amazing my life can be at times. Like I said, its hard for me to sleep right now because I am so excited about a thousand different things. I am going to attempt to sleep now. ahh

"We tend to forget that all good things take time." -John Wooden