Maybe its all as it should be....

The more you stop to think about life, the more confused you become. Life is so beautiful yet so dark and painful. It is happiness, it is sadness, it is desires and hopes and failures and brokenness. There are a million ways to look at one thing and that is why I like this quote.

no human being can ever really understand another, and no one can arrange anothers happiness.

I think that people can satisfy others emotional needs and other types of needs for a time being, but for their entire life? No..that comes from the individual. Only you can provide what you need to be happy. Yea, it is easier to feel happy when you have people to love and support you, but when your alone at night and with your thoughts, whether or not you are left feeling satisfied is all up to you. Its amazing to think about life. I am amazed every day by something new. Today it is how many different people are trying to navigate the same norms and routines of this world but they all have different values and secrets and things that make them who they are. So i sit here and think what is it about me and about my life that means something? Where do I want to go? I still dont know, but then i think about this quote:


if you dont know where your going, you might end up somewhere else

and i def dont know where I am going yet. There have been some experiences in the last few months that have taught me alot about what I am capable of doing and that have challenged my morals immensely. I embraced some moments and I do not regret it, even though since those blissful moments, I have been suffering. I know I am learning and growing. And now that I am 23, a year older, I feel the same, i must say. I am grateful for every day but disappointed with how I deal with some of those days. Day at a time and I can try to get better. This leads me to my last quote, which to me expresses the balance between having chaos and order in your life every single day and never giving up.

chaos often breeds life, while order breeds habit.

Let go of all of these mixed emotions....

"The truth is that our finest moments are most likely to occur when we are feeling deeply uncomfortable, unhappy, or unfulfilled. For it is only in such moments, propelled by our discomfort, that we are likely to step out of our ruts and start searching for different ways or truer answers."

"It takes a lot of courage to release the familiar and seemingly secure, to embrace the new. But there is no real security in what is no longer meaningful. There is more security in the adventurous and exciting, for in movement there is life, and in change there is power."

"Forgiving is not something you do for someone else. It is something you do for yourself. An unforgiven injury binds you to a time and place someone else has chosen; it holds you trapped in a past moment and in old feelings."

"You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, "I have lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along." . . . You must do the thing you think you cannot do."
~Eleanor Roosevelt~

"Look at each day as a chance to invest life into life. A chance to share your experience and deposit it into someone else's conscience. Each day is a chance to work miracles in the lives of others."

What is defeat? Nothing but education; nothing but the first steps to something better.
-Proverb

When something happens to you, you either let it defeat you, or you defeat it."
- Rosilind Russell

Those who wish to sing, always find a song.
-Swedish Proverb

You may not realize it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you.
-Walt Disney